Life
life advice
Decide or Slide
Rather than slipping into the circumstances you find yourself in, decide to take control of what you can to better your situation.

A friend of mine broke her upper arm recently. Considering she’s a massage therapist who’s been out of work on and off all year due to COVID-19; plus having a hastily re-organized virtual wedding as opposed to the long planned-for wedding of her dreams; along with the death of her beloved grandmother; this was just one more "yikes!" she has had to deal with. She feels like she’s been tossed around like a rag doll by events. Nothing like the calm, ordered, happy life she’s experienced most of her adulthood.

Heaven knows, she’s not alone. So much is going on these days that challenge us: the political scene, the pandemic and all its economic consequences, yet more fires and hurricanes, not to mention friends/family with COVID or other illnesses and injuries.

It’s easy to slide into negativity, into hopelessness and despair. Even with the best positive attitude in the world, these are trying times. What to do?

Decide. In other words, when you feel yourself sliding into negativity, into gloom and depression, decide. Be conscious, not knee-jerk reactionary unconscious. It’s beneath you. Instead, summon up your inner Captain Marvel and take a stand for the forces of good. Your good! Yes, set a timer for 20 minutes and allow yourself to rant, weep or whatever you do when in the throes of "It’s not fair!" I usually put the dogs outside (otherwise they’d try to comfort me and I’m not up for that yet), and then abuse umpteen pages of paper with scrawled histrionics. But once that timer dings, you’re done!

Figure out what you can do to either make yourself feel better or make the situation better. Get creative. You are a powerful human being with far more resources (inner and outer) than we generally give ourselves credit for.

Get mindful. Focus on one thing at a time and give it your complete, undivided attention. Decide that you are going to get through this, that you deserve to give yourself the best of yourself, and that’s your "can do," "always a way" self.

Decide or slide. The choice is yours.

Noelle C. Nelson, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist, consultant, popular speaker in the U.S. and abroad, and author of over a dozen best-selling books. Dr. Nelson focuses on how we can all enjoy happy, fulfilling lives while accomplishing great things in love, at home and at work, as we appreciate ourselves, our world and all others. She is the author of "Happy Healthy…Dead: Why What You Think You Know About Aging Is Wrong and How To Get It Right." You Matter. You Count. You Are Important. Visit www.noellenelson.com, Facebook.com/MeetTheAmazings, #MeetTheAmazings, @drnoellenelson.


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